Marriage is one the most sanctifying works in our Christian faith. The process of loving another, of forgiving often, and being totally sacrificial and unconditional in those two things is hard work. There is nothing easy about marriage – but everything holy about it.
Marriage takes work. It doesn’t matter what your marriage looks like, or the goals you might have for your marriage – it is hard work. You are taking two imperfect people and placing them in a covenant agreement for life.
Marriage takes grace.
Grace to forgive when you have been wronged- sometimes again and again.
Grace to look past pet peeves and imperfections.
Grace to let a person grow and change – all while you are growing and changing too.
Marriage is a choice we make every day to love and forgive and extend grace- just like the love, forgiveness, and grace that Jesus extends to us each day.
Yes, marriage takes grace.
It requires us to extend grace – but it also requires us to give grace to someone else.
That someone is you.
Yes, we must be willing to give grace to yourself in marriage. You see, we are going to fail. We are going to overstep our role in marriage. There are times when we are not going to be very forgiving, or our love might come across as conditional. There are times we are going to say something that might not be edifying to or about our husband. There are going to be times when I mess up as a wife.
We must give ourselves the grace to grow in our marriage. Yes, we need to give our husbands grace, but sister, we need it too.
If I am honest, I often have to give myself more grace than my husband. I see my flaws more readily – because I know my heart. In my heart, I know the times when I roll my eyes (even when he doesn’t see it). I know the times I struggle with the decisions he has made. I know the smart comments I think, but never leave my brain.
I know my flaws. I know my sins.
I need to give myself grace to grow in my marriage. Not grace to accept the internal eye rolls and bad attitude – but grace to know I am not perfect, but that I am a sinner. Then, I need to apply grace- the grace to change- all over my marriage. I need to start praying prayers over my marriage.
Friend, marriage is hard work. It isn’t all the butterflies and rainbows that the movies depict- or even that we see plastered all over Facebook. Marriage is under attack because of the picture that it is – and Satan wants nothing more than to destroy it.
So, we must fight for our marriages. The fight starts on our knees. We recognize the battle- and we go to it!
So give grace. Grace to your husband- and grace to yourself. Then, fight the good fight – and grow closer to God and your husband through it!
Worshiping With My Life,