When I scroll down my Facebook news feed something that always seems to get to me are these post about how their kids are above anyone or anything else in there lives. Not that our kids shouldn’t be in our top priority but they are not suppose to be number one about everything else. But our kids were never designed to be number one. God designed a certain relationship order in our homes. One that, I truly believe, if we follow will lead to happiness to all the relationships in our homes. It is a relationship order that seems to be long forgotten in today’s world but one we most certainly need to get back to if we want to strengthen our homes.
1. God is always suppose to be number one: For some reason this is forgotten by many even though we have all said it about a million times and we have all confessed it to be true. When we start however, tending to the needs of others before we invite God into our day with even the smallest of prayer are we not putting someone before Him. When we allow ourselves to use the excuse that we just did not have time to do our devotions or have alone time with God did we not put something or someone before Him. As a mom of 4 I get that our days can become insanely busy. This is why I get up way earlier than anyone else to ensure that I am allowing God into my day first. There is a verse that comes to mind that has always reminded me to seek God first before anything or anyone else.
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:33
Seeking God first and foremost helps us prepare for our family. It puts us in the right mindset to care for our family in the manner in which would be pleasing to Him
2.Our husbands our suppose to be next in line in the order of relationships in our home. Now this is where women usually get a little upset with me. When we got married most of us, unless you wrote your own vows, promised to cling to each other and forsake all others. This included your mom, dad, brother, sister, uncle, aunt, cousins and yes even your children. Yes they are a part of you. But they are not suppose to be put before your husband. The day you got married in the sight of God you became one person. This means that no one is suppose to separate you. Now when you have children this can be a bit of a conflict not to step in when two different parenting styles come into play. Yet these are things that need to be discussed in private. (Please note I am not saying that I am promoting letting your husband abuse your children. This is for those who are disciplining in a Biblical standpoint and I do not believe that God ever would promote abuse in any sort of way). When we are focusing however, on keeping our marriage strong this benefits of this trickle right on down to our children. Also showing our children that our husband is first helps lay the foundation for our children’s marriages in the future. We were made to be our husband’s help meet (Gen 2:18). The sooner we are wives start owning that title the better off our marriages and homes will be. This does not cause us to neglect our children. Instead it actually provides them with a stable home life. I have heard far to many times about marriages breaking up because they got so involved with the children that they lost touch with each other. Parenthood changes us, time changes us and our growth in the Lord changes us. This means we need to be focusing on connecting with our husbands as much as we can.
3.Our children are next. As a mother it is hard to remember that there are 2 others before my kids. Yet this is important but please note that our kids are still right toward the top of the list. It is important that we remember to keep them there. Turn on the news sometimes you can hear horror story after horror story about how parents have left their children allow to go do something they wanted to do. We see now more and more these days moms neglecting their responsibilities and letting grandparents raise their children. It is sad but it is also real life. Children are precious in God’s eyes. They are a gift to us. It is time that we all start acting that way instead of allowing things to come before our children. Even if they are covered in good intentions. We only get one shot to raise our children to love the Lord and it is a task that we need to take very seriously. It is no one else’s job to do this but ours as parents. Now I am not saying that others will not help shape them. What I am saying is that primarily this is our task and we need to do it well.
4. All others can now be added. This can include your family, friends and well anyone else. It is important to have them some sort of placement on your relationship list. One because unless you live in the middle of some deserted island then you are going to come into contact with people. These relationships need to make it on the list because we need to make sure that we are there to lead encouragement to a fellow Christian, minister to those who are lost and show our children what in means to serve others with a servants heart. They need to know that this applies even to those outside our homes.
5. Finally we are putting ourselves on the list. Notice here that we are at the bottom. Now this does not mean that we are not suppose to take care of ourselves but it does mean that we are putting our family and others before ourselves. We need not feel guilty when we need to take a little time for ourselves, Occasionally for me this means that my mother in law will take my children while my husband is at work so that I can write, read or simply shower. It doesn’t happen often but it is often enough for me to take a little time to spoil myself a bit. Moms and wives we need this time. We must have this time to replenish ourselves. So do not feel guilty for taking this time for yourself.
Until Next Time Just Keep Soaring 4 Him,